C O L U M N S

Tales from the Jugular

Whooya Talkin' 'Bout 1

By: Eric Compton
Published: Wednesday, April 4, 2007
This actually going to be my first entry of "Whooya Talkin' 'Bout". What am I talkin' 'bout and what is "Whooya Talkin' 'Bout"? Its simple really. I'm playing a little game of who said that. Over the years I've always enjoyed reading the liner notes and band musings inside record releases. You can really read some over the top craziness when browsing through the thank yous and the f@@@ yous of a liner note. So I thought it would be a fantastic idea to put those in a question format and allow our beloved readers to ponder who or what band said these outrageous quotes. Next issue we will answer the questions, name the pottymouth, and give you a few more explicits to look over.

Note - Anyone remotely disturbed by late night Showtime, Comedy Central, or Frank Hill's rants and raves after being rejected by yet another bimbo....well simply look no further.

1. "And to Dave Richards of Azra, for blatantly lying to us, not using our cover artwork and insert, running up our lawyer bill and jerking us around for seven months with our EP, may you get butt-fucked by a rhino with AIDS."

2. "Die painful and burn in Hell to" S. Logiodice/W. Schunke/Axel Morgan/K. Boesel, a real big bunch of motherfucking assholes".

3. "Fuck you to Biff Byford and his Pong."

4. "Special thanx to Barney for capturing the hearts of the children."

5. "...thanks goes to God, for giving to me this eternal hate against his concept and against his worshipers."

6. Hello Dudes: "......Eternity-X (R.I.P...Fuck me, Jamie, fuck me - the last edgay colon cowboy)".

7. "Joey Capobianco sucks fat dicks"

8. "And let me swing the big fucking sledgehammer through the skulls of all stoner rock faggots, gothic queers, black metal dorks, teeny bopper pussies, rapper jackasses, and most of all you cheesy heavy metal trendies!"

9. "...and most importantly to all of the bands who made millions from pirating our work, our creativity and our artistry while we were in Japan, we say shame on you and prepare to be embarrassed and humbled by the mighty ______!!!"

10. "...Tom, "if it wasn't for me there'd be no band, you wouldn't have a girlfriend, my cap, I got a cat, a dog, a bat, a rat, and a knife, I'll kill you, Kiss rules, Moooo Hoohoohahaha" Browne.



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RANDOM ACTS OF METAL
. Bathory. Into Eternity
. Loudness. Dokken
. Exmortem. Cradle of Filth
. Commit Suicide. Celestial Ode
. Circle II Circle. Majesty
. Steel Attack. Crematorium
. Firewind. Metallica
. Abigor. God Dethroned
. Power of Omens. Valley's Eve
. Black Label Society. Vyndykator
. Led Zeppelin. The Chainsaw
. Ion Vein. Nicta
. Catch 22. Iced Earth
. Wycked Synn. Morbid Angel
. Lanfear. Evanesce
. Malstrom. Savatage
. Edguy. Brides of Destruction
. Dreamaker. Three Inches of Blood
. Force Of Evil. I Hate Sally
. Black Stone Cherry. Cryonic Temple
. downBleed. Kingcrow
. Outworld. Graveland
. David Shankle Group. Skyfire
. Gamma Ray. Highlord
. Nova Lex. Jorn
. Gary Moore. Zaius
. Dragonspoon. Estuary
. Fabrizio Bonanno. Schenker/ Pattison Summit
. Acrid. Metal Church
. Psychotron. Dio
. Beaten Back To Pure. Medusa
. Nashville Pussy. Division
. Annihilator. Age Of Silence
. I.C.E.. Necrodemon
. House of Shakira. The Last Act
. Blind Guardian. Trans-Siberian Orchestra
. Mirror of Deception. Hanzel Und Gretyl
. Twisted Sister. Helgrind
. The Mighty Nimbus. Kings X
. Impaled. Soilwork
. Apocalyptica. Crimson Moonlight
. Oathean. Boomerang
. Bleed The Sky. Bruce Dickinson
. Frantic Bleep. Magica
. Kinrick. Operatika
. Ramesses. Raging Speedhorn
. Vicious Art. Sentenced
. Unchained. Secrets She Kept
. Nuse. Monolithe
. Leaves Eyes. Killing Spree
. Nightvision. Impaled Nazarene
. Scar Symmetry. A Lower Deep
. Octavia Sperati. Illuminatus
. Winterfell. ASG
. Barcode. Twilight
. Mabon. Avenged Sevenfold
. Ewigkeit. Even X
. Overmars. Celebratum
. Bronx Casket Company. The Tenth Circle
. Taunusheim. Lair Of The Minotaur
. Fields Of The Nephilim. Dissection
. Clawfinger. Leviathan/Sapthuran
. Moonspell. Elvenking
. Candlemass. Hirax
. Hate Profile. Non-Human Level
. Fragments of Unbecoming. Unsilent Phenomenon
. Warface. Mouth of the Architect
. Burialmound. Wednesday 13
. Battle Bratt. Wastefall
. Audrey Horne. Darkness Eternal
. Centinex. Melechesh
. Fu Manchu. Southern Gentleman
. Dream Theater. Necrophobic
. Madking Ludwig. Incrave
. Marc Sasso. Nominon
. Since the Day. Himsa
. Depressed Mode. Temple Of Blood
. Diamond Dogs. Night Ranger
. Pathology. Ride The Sky
. Cockpit. Trivium
. SOS. Vulture Industries
. Kreator. Souls Of We
. Equilibrium. Medieval Steel
. End of Man. Papa Roach
. Wolfgate. Suffocation